The Escaped Fetal Pigs - "Rob Lowe's Video Store"

This is from the tv show Musical Mayhem.  Jimmie Frederick taped the show at The Good Tymes Pub in Bowling Green, Ohio USA in the Fall of 1991.  "Rob Lowe's Video Store" poked fun at the infamous sex video that came out featuring Rob Lowe and an underage girl at the 1988 Democratic convention.  It has a fun disco beat.  Well, the song does anyway.  I don't know if the sex video does; I never saw it that I can recall.  In any case, I don't remember doing so, but, like Ronald Reagan, I don't remember much of the 1980s, but yes, mistakes were made, so maybe I did.  Probably not though, because it's not like these days where videos get spread throughout the Internet quickly.  Back then, tapes had to get bootlegged, copied, and passed around, and a bit more work was involved.  Watching Rob have sex probably didn't interest me much, though I do remember that he came to Bowling Green to campaign for Michael Dukakis (the scandal happened later when the tape surfaced).  Anyway, old Rob Lowe managed to bounce back from that scandal pretty well.  One hopes the girls/women in the video managed to also do so.  In the song, the video store sells only naughty video tapes until the police arrive to arrest Rob Lowe.  A staple of the live set was having the members of the band claim to be Rob Lowe to impress women only to deny being Rob Lowe when the police arrive.  On this particular night, we modified that shtick a bit to include a shoutout to our buddy Scott Law of the Toledo hardcore band The Stain.  We were a bit fascinated with Scott at the time.  He was an outrageous frontman who one never knew what he might do on stage.  He could take off his pants.  He could show up with an ax and chop up the stage.  He could offer to have sex to stop a war.  Supposedly, his band would start supplying him with various drugs well before showtime and then watch what happened when he hit the stage.  Who knows the truth though?  The stories, rumors, and legends are endless.  We certainly enjoyed him and his antics.  If The Pigs had stayed together, I am sure we would have written a song about him.

Alas, for now, you have to settle for one about Rob Lowe.